Running on Empty
The Kite Runner is a new film directed by Marc Forster based on Khaled Hosseini's international best-selling book of the same name. It is set in Afghanistan and the United States. It follows the life of Amir who is brought up by his father in Kabul and later, as a young man, moves to the States. Although I have not read the book the film is thought to be a good dramatisation of the novel. Khaled Hosseini was a consultant in the making of the film.
As a child, Amir's best friend is Hassan. Amir is the son of the householder and Hassan is the son of his servant, Ali. Although they come from different social strata, Amir and Hassan are good and close friends. In the film Hassan movingly speaks about his devotion to Amir. There are several pledges of friendship beyond the call of duty. But in the course of their friendship, Amir is challenged and confronted with how much he is willing to brave in order to stand by his friend Hassan, and in the event betrays him.
There are two incidents where he lets Hassan down. One is when Hassan is raped by a group of older youths. And the other is where Amir contrives to make it appear that Hassan has stolen his watch. The motivation is not entirely clear but it is as though there is an underlying thread of deceit in Amir's personality. As a result of the incident with the watch Hassan and his father Ali move out of the household. They are ashamed of having been caught up in theft.
Hassan, for whatever reason, admits to stealing the watch although this wasn't actually the case. In all this there is a kind of humility and submission, which doesn't strike back, even when your best friend has wronged you.
The film touchingly portrays an aspect of Islamic culture, which is able to show immense compassion and humility, even towards your enemies. This is in stark contrast to much of what we see represented by a more aggressive strain in Islam. This welcome contrast has been largely lost on Western perspectives of Islamic society, where fundamentalism so much clouds the picture.
As the film continues we see Amir moving to the States and as a young man he marries and begins a new life there. But in adulthood his conscience is stricken with the wrong he has done to his friend Hassan. It is the unravelling of his guilt and its resolution, which makes up the second part of the film. It is a wound that has been cut very deep.
Life has many pathways and twists and turns. There are often regrets and burdens carried, as Amir carried his guilt to another country, but had to return to his homeland to resolve.
The season of Lent, which we enter in February, is a time of self-examination and reflection. It mirrors the forty days spent by our Lord in the wilderness and the preparation and reflection, which he undertook there before his formal ministry began. As a young man I can remember being struck by the words of Archbishop Anthony Bloom of the Russian Orthodox Church. He made it clear that guilt serves little useful purpose. It can prompt action but if left to lie in the heart it can become self-indulgent. And he also used to say that there were some forgivenesses which were not of concern to God. By which he meant that when there were wrongs between people it was the people who needed to do the forgiving, and not God.
Amir was right to return to Afghanistan to resolve his betrayal of his friend Hassan. For it was with Hassan that forgiveness truly lay. This path is thwarted when he finds that Hassan has died. Nevertheless in the film there is portrayed great generosity of spirit and loving kindness between people. It is this, which is healing and forgiving when wrongs have been done. It is this we need to show to each other to overcome guilt and hatred and despair which so easily build up. It is this graciousness of spirit, which reflects the grace and mercy of God and shows us how ready He is to receive those who come to Him. We can lift one another's burdens and, when necessary, we may find with God a forgiveness and resolution, which only He can give.
Lent is a time when broken relationships can be healed and when burdens, which we carry, maybe that we have carried for a long time, can finally be laid down and our lives restored through God's mercy. We can do this for ourselves or with the help of a friend, or priest, if formal confession is sought. We can find forgiveness from others, if we have wronged them by having courage to face them. Whatever it is, we may also seek good counsel and discussion, good dialogue and understanding as well.
The act of confession and forgiveness, whether between two people, or whether between ourselves and God, often needs the oil of conversation and explanation, because lives which have been wronged, or damaged, do not easily walk tall again. Only loving honesty clothed in dignity can set us on the right path again. Trust needs to be restored and time allowed to pass for our wounds to heal.
Canon David Eaton, from the Feb 2008 magazine